Is Friday the 13th unlucky? Judge for yourself.
Friday 13, 2012. My 38th Birthday. I woke up at 3:30 a.m. to get ready to go for an early morning run. Yes. I am psychotic. Here's my excuse for the early morning wake up call though. I had to leave my house at 4:30 a.m. and I need an hour of prep before I run. Prep=sit on the toilet.
So, after my "prep" I stood in front of the mirror to put my contacts in. I squeezed the contact solution bottle over my hand. Empty. Thank goodness, I had bought a spare bottle a few days before at Walmart. I opened the package, noticing that there was a red cap on the bottle. Doesn't red usually equal danger?
I pored plenty of the new solution onto my contact and stuck it in my eye. Oh, the pain! My eye was on fire. I could hardly pry my eyelid open to remove my contact. I had just blinded myself on my birthday. I knew something bad was going to happen on Friday the 13th!
With my good spare eye, I checked out the packaging on the contact solution. Of course. Guess I should've checked out the warning label: NEVER PUT SOLUTION ON CONTACT AND THEN DIRECTLY PUT IN EYE. LET SOLUTION SIT ON CONTACTS FOR AT LEAST 6 HOURS!! IF SOLUTION DOES GO DIRECTLY IN EYE, QUICKLY RINSE EYE WITH MASS QUANTITIES OF WATER!
Seriously. Now I have a bum eye for my birthday.
I headed out for my run after frantically rinsing my eye out. Because I had spent so much time trying to fix my eye, I ran out of time to get back on the toilet, and thus . . . well, I had to use the restroom on the road. Nothing out of the ordinary.
When I got home, I hopped in the shower, put on my swimsuit, and headed off for a swim lesson. I am not a swimmer. But, I'd really like to become one. A really amazing trainer was at the pool to give me some swimming tips. Everything went fine until the final lap. I stood up. Fully vertical. And what do you know? Nipple hanging out of my suit. What?! You may wonder how this could happen to someone with no boobs. No boobs does not equal no nipples. And after nursing four children, let's just say, it is not a pretty sight. The horror. Poor trainer man. Poor me.
Happy Friday the 13th!