Tuesday, September 15, 2009

Not So Tasty Pork Tenderloin

I was so grateful to my mom for making dinner on Sunday. My only assignment was to bring the rolls. Now, I have spent a lot of time training my kids to always be polite about whatever is served for dinner. They can be honest, but not mean. For example, when I served the Pizza Casserole last week, I got comments like, "This is interesting, Mom." "Is this pepperoni in here?" and my personal favorite, "Are we going to be having this as leftovers tomorrow night?" Because I force the kids to be polite, I also have to be a good example.

So, when Mom showed up with dinner, we peeked under the foil wrapped skillet to see what the main dish looked like. To my chagrin, I saw 2 lumps of grey meat with dallops of purple goo on top. My nostrils quaked as the ripe smell of fish filtrated through the air. What were we having for dinner?

The kids voiced my thoughts, "What is it, Grandma Joannie?"

"It's pork tenderloin," my mom said. "All I had to do was put a little grape jelly on top, check it with a meat thermometer, and voila, it was done!" The side dish mom brought was a new recipe as well: vegetable curry. The kids looked mortified.

Nyah pulled me aside. "Mom, do I have to eat that?"

"Yes, Nyah. You at least have to try it!"

I was wondering if I was going to be able to get it down myself.

Everyone sat around the table, staring at the pork tenderloin medallions on the plate.

Carson voiced our thoughts, "It sure looks like fish!"

Ian, my fish lover, had already dug in. "It tastes like fish too, Grandma!" Ian was overjoyed!

At the end of the meal, the pork tenderloin medallions were almost completely gone, thanks to Aaron, Grandpa Markie, and Ian. Grandma Joannie and I also made a valiant effort at eating the fishy pork. Needless to say, all of the pork eaters, with Ian as the exception (he has an iron stomach), were in the restroom most of the night. This recipe will not be added to my recipe collection.


Dainon said...

Hilarious. Aren't you afraid your mother will read this? Since it's on YOUR blog, I can feel safe in saying my mother is the worst cook I know.. These types of experiences were daily occurrences in my family. To this day, on the top shelf of my mom's built in bookshelf, there is a shoebox that was made into a diorama of the manger scene when my mom was Primary President. Behind the cut out baby Jesus in the manger, sits a 25 year old piece of moldy liver and onions. (Mom thinks I ate it...) :)

Memzy said...

Cali is 14?!!!!!

And wow. On the pork. Was it undercooked? Is that why it smelled like fish?

Stina said...

I'm guessing your mom doesn't read your blog? :)

Mary Todd said...

Dear Vanessa,

You have probably wondered where Livingston and I have been for the last several months. Thank you for your thoughts and prayers.

As usual, what started out to be a perfectly relaxing sabbatical in Kazakhstan turned out to be a real horror story. We were hiking near the Aral Sea when Livingston spotted a Ruddy Shelduck (Tadorna ferruginea) nesting along the shore. He crept up on the bird, snatched it by the neck and stuck it in his backpack. What the idiot didn't realize was that the bird is on the Kazakhstan endangered species list and he was arrested at the airport for smuggling.

We sought assistance from the American Embassy but waited several weeks before Livingston was released from the Aral jail and was told never to return.

It's so good to be back in the United States and to catch up on your blog. Would it be possible to get your mother's recipe for the medallions. Livingston thought it might help clear up some stomach problems he encountered in the local jail in Kazakhstan.